Author: Eric Nilsson

OCTOBER 3, 2023 – In early 2015 UB was hospitalized again; nothing life threatening, but another chink in his armor. Cliff kept me closely apprised, and notified me when UB was about to be discharged to a transitional facility at a local nursing home. Cliff’s later call caught me off guard, however. He was in …

OCTOBER 2, 2023 – Mother, meanwhile, was losing altitude in both the mental and physical realms. Of course that tends to happen when a person hits 90 and shuffles into the uncertain territory beyond. Her memory—short-term and long-term—was still impressive, but her anxiety about minor matters, such as exactly where I parked my car during …

OCTOBER 1, 2023 – My journal entry for Friday, June 22, 2012 reflected a chronic preoccupation with “Old Joisey”: Last night I experienced a highly symbolic dream, as so often occurs in my dream world. On this occasion, the subject matter was New Jersey, which has occupied so much of my thoughts over the past …

SEPTEMBER 30, 2023 – As UB approached 90 after Mother had officially reached 89, the two of them seemed to be holding their own—physically, anyway: UB still attended the weekly seniors exercise class offered at the Kip Community Center in Rutherford (he was the only male and the oldest participant). Though Mother was slowing down, …

SEPTEMBER 29, 2023 – We’d first met 37 years before—in the summer of 1975—for all of about 10 seconds. Grandpa had asked me to deliver some papers to the law offices of Smith & Ely at 17 Ames Avenue in Rutherford. He said the papers were his and Gaga’s signed wills and trust documents. I …

SEPTEMBER 28, 2023 – Whatever message UB intended by dropping me off at the bus stop on that October afternoon, I chose to ignore it. When I returned to Minnesota, I took the bold step of sending him a friendly letter in which I reaffirmed his “capital idea” regarding disposition of Hamburg (bequeathing it to …

SEPTEMBER 27, 2023 – Gaga’s antique Toyota was nowhere to be seen. Cliff later informed me that UB and Angelo’s attempts to resuscitate it had failed; it was subsequently junked (for good)) so the garage it had occupied could be rented out by Cliff’s efforts for UB’s benefit. Also gone was Grandpa’s 1984 burgundy Cadillac, …

SEPTEMBER 26, 2023 – In October (2011) Beth and I made another trip to New York, this time to check on the recent graduate’s adjustment to the real world . . . of international banking. I used the sojourn as an excuse to venture across the Hudson—this time alone—to tilt again at the family’s windmill. …

SEPTEMBER 25, 2023 – Dad once pointed out to me that as you age, each increment of time becomes a smaller percentage of your life’s total. “And that,” he said, “is why time seems to accelerate the older you become.” After he’d provided this perspective, each day, week, month, year of my life clicked away …

SEPTEMBER 24, 2023 – (Cont.) I don’t think Mother was always so cheap. Maybe it was Dad’s influence: as he used to joke, “We Småläningar[1]are so frugal we dilute our water.” But if he led a life-long campaign against waste of any kind, he wasn’t cheap; he wasn’t one to buy sub-standard products. “You get …

SEPTEMBER 23, 2023 – Though I’d predicted accurately that Mother would never ask to see Björnholm again, I was surprised that after we moved her hurriedly into an assisted living facility, she expressed no longing for the house at 505 Rice in Anoka. In fact, she returned to it but twice. The first time was …

SEPTEMBER 22, 2023 – UB was the least sentimental person in the family. He never said a word about his youth or “the good ol’ days” except for talking a couple of times in his 80s about army life during the war and the occasion in 2006 when he slowed the car on the bridge …

SEPTEMBER 21, 2023 – Conditions at 42 Baghdad Street saw no improvement in 2008. Cliff remained as busy as ever with Cliffhanger Productions, barreling straight through the financial crisis that fall. If people’s investment portfolios were taking a major hit, rich folks still needed someone to produce over-the-top birthday parties for their kids, and Cliff …

SEPTEMBER 20, 2023 – I had no further contact with UB for the rest of 2006. On March 2, 2007, I took another stab at submitting a proposal, or rather, an outline of a process for disposition of Gaga and Grandpa’s estates and trusts and distribution of Mother’s inheritance. Less than three weeks later he …

SEPTEMBER 19, 2023 – Three weeks later Cliff called.  After I exchanged his “What’s happenin’?” with my, “The usual,” he gave me an update on UB. Looming over our conversation but unspoken was the question, As between us and UB, who would outlast whom? But more immediate circumstances had prompted Cliff’s call. “Eric, just when …

SEPTEMBER 18, 2023 – Off to war we went. Except we didn’t. None of us—least of all Cliff—could believe how quickly our determined strategy against UB would be upended. The day following our emergency family council, Mother was already playing the role of saboteur and as usual against her self-interest. While talking with Dad over …

SEPTEMBER 17, 2023 – It was one of the few times in modernity that our immediate family—Mother, Dad, Nina, Elsa, Jenny, and I—were together. The place was Jenny and Garrison’ elegant home in St. Paul, a million miles from 42 Baghdad Street. The occasion was Mother and Dad’s 60th anniversary.  We’d celebrated their 50th in …

SEPTEMBER 16, 2023 – If I’d wanted to stay clear of New Jersey, New Jersey didn’t want to stay clear of me. Or more precisely, Cliff wouldn’t let me bury my head in the sand. Less than two weeks after my return to Minnesota, he called to sound the alarm—yet again—about the money stream going …

SEPTEMBER 15, 2023 – My life at this stage of the story—the day after the blow-up—was not entirely consumed by matters in Rutherford, New Jersey. The normal stresses and strains of life continued unabated. Our oldest son Cory was giving us a run for our money, and Byron was heavily involved in a host of …

SEPTEMBER 14, 2023 – At around 4:30, UB’s van appeared in the driveway. His return signaled that it was time to take another run at sorting out Mother’s inheritance. He acknowledged me but not uncivilly, which meant he withheld a negative greeting such as the “Uh-oh” I’d received the day before. I followed him up …

SEPTEMBER 13, 2023 – It was 1:30 a.m. when my phone’s ringtone woke me from a deep slumber. It was Cliff. “What the hell?” I answered. “What’s happenin’?” “Apart from no longer being sound asleep, not much. What’s up?” I said, still trying to find my bearings. Cliff explained that he’d just returned to his …

SEPTEMBER 12, 2023 – At noon on Saturday I appeared at the back door of 42 Baghdad Street. My knocking prompted a loud unwelcoming “Hello!” Quick footsteps to the doorway followed but the door opened only enough for UB to identify his visitor. “Uh-oh,” he said. It wasn’t the friendly “uh-oh” of faux-dismay but an …

SEPTEMBER 11, 2023 – I took UB’s statement—“Send me a proposal”—at face value. On the flight home I spelled out in bullet-point form the terms of a plan for accountability, closing out Gaga and Grandpa’s estates, and distributing Mother’s share.  I knew the centerpiece would be 42 Lincoln. Consistent with what I’d told UB, whatever …

SEPTEMBER 10, 2023 – My mission on that trip to New Jersey was a failure except to the extent I now knew that probate cases had been opened—though nothing had progressed beyond the most preliminary steps.  UB was released from the hospital the next day, thus ending my free access to his “record storage system” …

SEPTEMBER 9, 2023 – As luck would have it, UB’s release from the hospital was slated for the end of the week, if he passed all his tests and his cardiologist approved. His confinement would afford me unfettered access to his chaotic files and papers. But first I had to rack up another round of …